Balancing Act

All of my life I’ve been a doer. I craft a thoughtful plan (some may say overthink, ha!) and I follow it up with action. My words are important to me and they carry weight. I want what I say and do to matter and to reflect my core.

However the last few years of my life have shown me that no matter how thoughtful a plan you may have, it doesn’t always play out the way we drew it up. Sometimes our mindfully selected words fall flat. Other times our intentions are twisted and assumptions are made. Our honesty can be mistaken for thoughtlessness.

No matter how meticulous of a planner I can be, I can’t overlook the act of surrender. But what’s the line that separates initiative from surrender? What’s the margin of error between trust and hustle? I know idleness will never breed success but I also know initiative can only take you so far.

Is the opposite of initiative, surrender? Surrender allows space between the notes, pause between the words, and room for some magic to take place. When we fully release control and let go of our planned outcome we leave the grey space up to God. 

Where is the both/and? What does a true relationship between surrender and initiative look like? How can these two qualities lead together to create a thoughtfully adventurous life?

It’s a balancing act of sorts, a give-and-take. I don’t know the perfect equation or if it’s an equal parts recipe. My black and white lens can sometimes overlook the patience of meant-to-be partnerships. 

But what do I know? I know that God isn’t asking me to figure it out rather He’s asking me to trust that He already has. Matthew 6:33-34 says, “But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness (standard, character, attitude or action) and all things will be added to you. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself….”.

Initiative should breed surrender. God can’t bless it if He’s not in the middle of it. First, I must align myself and initiate my focus on God, then I surrender. The action is the alignment. The initiation is making sure my heart’s centered in God. Then I surrender my outcome knowing God’s plan contains far more treasure than my own.