Polite Bite

I hated blueberries for the first 32 years of my life. 

I picked them out of muffins, left them out of fruit salads and passed them up at the grocery store. They looked suspicious to me.

In our house we have a ‘polite bite’ rule. You don’t have to finish all the food on your plate but you must at least try a bite of everything. One night at dinner my son Dawson noticed I had left my blueberries to the side of my plate and he called me out. I started to defend myself when it occurred to me, had I actually ever eaten a blueberry?

I grabbed a few plump blueberries, closed my eyes and popped them in my mouth. I braced for the disgusting taste I knew was soon to follow…except it never came. My taste buds were met with a delightful mix of tangy and sweet juices. I liked blueberries? How could this be?! I had missed out on thousands of opportunities to enjoy this delicious fruit because I prided myself on an opinion that wasn’t even based in truth. Perhaps there once was a taste test I’d since forgotten, but I overlooked the fact that things change, people change and apparently taste buds change too.

I’ll be the first to admit, I’m loyal to a fault. I’ll well overthink something internally, process it with a few trusted advisors and then form my deep loyalties. While that might not sound like a bad thing the problem shows itself when I come to the crossroad of a new experience clashing with my rooted loyalty. I become so prideful in wanting to be ‘right’ I refuse to process the new data that may lead me to a different conclusion. After a series of compromises later I find myself in a direction I was never intended for with an ego that feels the tension between changing her mind and being true to her now obviously incorrect loyalty. This space is so real to me and one I find my self wrestling in often.

This thought pattern led me to a conversation with a friend and her advise I come back to daily. Not only did she give me permission to change my mind at any given moment because I am a different version of me today than I was yesterday, but she also gifted me a mantra:

‘Try it on.’

Before you commit to something or feel like you have to fully know the outcome first, ‘try it on’ and see how it fits. Similar to getting dressed, we may need to go through a few options before we land on the best fit for us. 

What have you overlooked or been avoiding that you need to revisit? What can you take a ‘polite bite’ of to see how it mixes with your taste buds today? How can you know if something is or isn’t meant for you if you haven’t tasted the experience first? 

The freedom I found in this lens has allowed me to swap out unnecessary and agonizing mental energy with an abundance of new experiences and creative thinking I would have missed out on entirely. This way of living is really living.